Maybe you’ve forgotten or maybe you’re new to me, but some time ago (let’s call it two years) I made a book with words in it. It came from a blogging project. It did not become an international internet sensation. Not everything can, you know. The internet and the human attention span are finite.
30 Failures by Age 30 is still available, despite my now being…some years over 30 (let’s call it two years). But maybe you know someone who is turning 30 or experiencing some other age-related life crisis and you would like to purchase a novelty book to make them feel better about themselves. 30 Failures by Age 30 will do the trick! It won’t solve the problem. My book offers no solutions, no nifty tips for feeling less like an unsuccessful, underachieving slob. The best it can offer is a few chuckles and a sense of relief that there’s at least one other person who didn’t meet society’s standards.
There’s a book trailer for the book. I’ve since mastered the hula hoop but still terrible at drawing on myself with magic marker. And I won’t be asked to perform at the local go-go dancing establishment.
The digital edition is also available to download from iTunes bookstore, Amazon, Kobo, and Smashwords for the remarkably low price of $1.99. For the purposes of gift-giving and bookshelf-filling, 30 Failures by Age 30 comes in a convenient slim paperback edition for $7.95, exclusively at Amazon.com.
The original list of 30 failures was created in 2009. In 2011, after publishing the book, I came up with a list of even more failures! I am really good at not doing things and/or doing things terribly. What’s the German word for feeling simultaneously good and bad about oneself?
If you’re throwing a 30th birthday, you can download these Bingo cards for an instant party game. The prize is probably booze and self-loathing but maybe you can find some gag gifts and doodads from the Oriental Trading catalog.
…I don’t think my self-promotion skills have improved either, you guys. Should I put that on the list for the sequel?